An expert's view: Coming to terms with grief and rapid change during a pandemic

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This past week as coronavirus restrictions have slowly eased across the country, Australians have been able to enjoy a slight reprieve from what can only really be described as a rollercoaster ride we didn’t really want to go on. The initial tension and panic have slowly made way for an acceptance of this new way of life complete with physical distancing, the home office and Zoom calls.

Earlier last month, we released a study unpacking the psyche of Australians as they grappled with ‘Finding the New Normal’. Working closely with grief expert Dr Lefteris Patlamazoglou from Monash University, we uncovered that people were likely to experience a journey of seven emotional states before they finally came to accept and feel some sort of closure in this ‘new normal’.

Following the release of this study, we sat down with Dr Patlamazoglou to ask how we, as individuals and marketers in a pandemic, can be recognised and respond to these new emotions.

We The People: A lot of people at the moment have described feeling a bit restless or having a deep feeling of uncertainty – could you unpack what this feeling is?

Dr Lefteris Patlamazoglou: The current health pandemic has generated a rapidly changing scheme. Information about the nature and spread of the virus is frequently updated. New implications that affect a large number of people are identified daily. In order to minimise their uncertainty and satisfy their curiosity, people seek to expand their knowledge about the virus by consuming relevant media. The dynamic situation of the health pandemic and extended exposure to news may cause us to worry about the loss of predictability and safety and the direction of the future. Worrying about the course of the pandemic while having limited control over its implications may increase our restlessness.

WTP: Could you help us understand the difference between micro-grief and macro-grief; and how is it manifesting within people?

Dr P: While some losses are incurred on a personal level, others are experienced on a collective level. On a personal, micro level, we may experience the loss of our individual freedom (to travel, visit friends, etc.), deterioration of our health status, poor sleep hygiene, reduced income, unemployment, unfulfilled potential and limited social connectedness. The broader, macro-level losses impact our families and social networks, communities, country and even humanity. For instance, we may sense or worry about the loss of our family’s health, economic repercussions, reduced essential services, closure of businesses, and compromised public health and safety. It is important to not only acknowledge and grieve our own losses but also to express our compassion for the losses grieved by our loved ones and communities.

WTP: The world as we know it has very quickly changed; can you explain the psychological impact of such a quick shift?

Dr P: One of the most intensely felt losses on a collective level is the loss of normalcy. We yearn for a return to a previous, familiar state. Although we are unable to ascertain the overall duration and long-term impact of the current situation, we are already aware that the current state of the world has changed. On the other end of this pandemic, there may be new definitions of normalcy that we are presently unable to grasp. Even people who have not been immediately impacted by the disease may be emotionally distressed. The rapid nature and magnitude of this change may trigger responses related not only to grief but also stress and trauma. These responses may be in the form of poor sleep hygiene, unusual eating patterns, fear, shock, low concentration and energy levels, a heightened sense of alertness and increased use of alcohol and other drugs. The pandemic is also very likely to intensify people’s existing mental health issues and introduce additional layers of complexity to their daily coping.

WTP: Are there any strategies people can implement to come to terms with this change quicker?

Dr P: Everybody grieves differently. When it comes to grieving, there is no one specific way or timeframe. Experiences and expressions of grief vary vastly and include intuitive patterns, such as processing and sharing emotions, crying, and lamenting, and instrumental patterns, like thinking about the loss, intellectualising it and attending to physical tasks. It is important that we identify and respect our grieving patterns and pace. Sitting with our grief and allowing it to wash over us will help us come to terms with it.

As Irvin Yalom described, grieving is like staring at the sun: it is confronting and not sustainable for long periods of time, so we need to distract ourselves briefly and return to it. Helpful distractions include conversations about our favourite movies, exercise, mindfulness meditation, music, and work, where possible.

Compassion during times of collective grief is fundamental. Supporting people around us to grieve in their own ways will facilitate their acceptance of the situation and foster a much-needed sense of connection and belonging.

Although a large part of the health pandemic is beyond our control, there are still choices we can make and opportunities to get out of our comfort zones. We may experiment with new health routines, pick a new hobby, host virtual dinners with our loved ones, reconnect with colleagues we have not heard from in a while, and recalibrate and reframe our career goals. We must be gentle with ourselves and those around us during this experimentation and acknowledge that our productivity may be compromised. Our hope and aspirations will enable the integration of the change into our personal, spiritual, social and professional lives. We must also ensure to reward ourselves for progress, commend those around us, and celebrate our successes in order to develop new, helpful patterns and attitudes.

WTP: As marketers, it’s our job to find the right time to communicate certain messages about our brand or products to people – however, this event has seemingly disrupted normal psychological states that we’re used to. What worked previously, now might not be working as well. How can marketers become more attentive towards people’s attitudes in response to ‘grieving’?

Dr P: During the current health pandemic, the needs and scope of consumers have been redefined as part of the rapidly changing environment. It is pertinent to consider that during times of collective grief people may be unaware that they and those around them are grieving, and hence experience disenfranchisement. Grief may compromise people’s concentration and motivation to engage with complex messages. The general uncertainty may lead to tentativeness to make large-scale financial commitments and non-essential investments. Research about grieving responses, specifically about the yearning for normalcy and understanding of the wave-like pattern of grief may help brands develop informed and fine tuned strategies, while at the same time retaining and fostering the trust of their audience.

WTP: How can people and brands best position themselves towards people going through a journey of grieving and help support them through this process?

Dr P: As this is an extraordinary situation, it is fair to expect that marketers and organisations may be unfamiliar with ways of navigating this landscape. The process of learning may involve retraining and adoption of new marketing approaches that can allow brands to tune into the attitudes and grief responses of their audiences. The dynamic nature of the situation also calls for ongoing evaluation of the consumers’ needs and feedback-informed review of the brands’ priorities.

Empathy and compassion can be demonstrated not only by individuals but also by brands and organisations. Ethical marketing can be contextualised and attentive to consumers’ needs and listen to their grief. In the present pandemic, there are opportunities for brands to demonstrate their creativity and human side by inspiring and connecting with grieving consumers. The messages of “we are in this together” and “we are here for you” promote a much-needed sense of belonging for grievers who may feel disconnected due to practices of social and physical distancing. Invitations to communicate, converse and create ongoing dialogues are also likely to be appreciated by consumers. Acknowledging the inconveniences and losses incurred by the heath pandemic and making over-and-above allowances may help satisfy grieving consumers’ need for validation.

People generally relate with their brands and during times of change, they need to see their brands maintain their confidence, core values and vision while adapting to the new reality. Grieving consumers often desire reassurance about the present state of their brand and a sense of predictability and stability about its future direction. To soothe their consumers’ uncertainty and confusion, brands and organisations may find merit in distributing fact sheets and specialised information that answers their questions before they ask them.

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Finding the new normal, an analysis of the Australian consumer